If your grandmother's name was Maria Immaculata...

... you have body hair. That's all there is to it. For mine, it was even sprouting out of my nose like some old dude. Gross and I bought one of those hair/nose trimmers in order to rectify the situation.

Today however, I discovered that the battery died or something. My trimmers were not working. In desperation, I grabbed my tweezers (used for my unruly eyebrows like normal women have and for my freakish once-in-a-while chin hairs that women with Italian grandmothers have), and yanked out all the hairs emerging from my nostrils. The pain made me wince, but the procedure was a success.

In other news, I'm moving in with the bf.

Quick quiz

What do all these items have in common?

• Vegan brownie
• Breakfast cookie
• Apple Bran muffin
• Vanilla bean scone
• Apricot scone
• English muffin with spinach and egg

If you guesssed "Starbucks items that Susan loved but were sadly discontinued at least in Toronto at the stores she frequents" then you are correct! I give up. There is no Starbucks food item I particularly enjoy now.

I've tried the substitutions. The english muffin became the feta/spinach wrap and it's not bad. The apple bran muffin has become the pomgranate bran muffin. I tried that this morning and am now completely crabby as it was a thoroughly unpleasant food experience. It was somehow greasy but with none of the delight of a doughnut or some other such food that I expect grease from. The biggest travesty though has to be the replacement of the beloved and delectable vegan brownie with some vile low-fat chocolate cake. How on earth can chocolate cake be less moist and delicious than a vegan dessert? Yet somehow it is.

Like I wrote: I've given up. I just get food items elsewhere now. At least I shouldn't have to worry about espresso disappearing from the Starbucks menu anytime soon.

*A further note on VIA: Holy crap is it caffeinated! I had to switch back to espresso, which apparently has about half the caffeine, as odd as that seems to most people

Becoming a dog person

I am a cat person. I like dogs, as long as they aren't mine. However, my new guy has a dog, and his family has two other dogs. They are all mid-sized dogs too - the smallest is 35 pounds, the largest, maybe 70- so there's no avoiding them. Whenever I go over, I am circled by these barking, fleshy sharks. All of them have wonderfully kind natures so it's not a terror moment, it's just an in-your-face [or more accurately, in-your-crotch] moment. It's such an adjustment.

Like I said, I'm a cat person, and I'm a cat person for the exact reasons that dog people don't like cats. First of all, I LOVE the disdain of a cat. I like the fact that they keep to themselves. I love the fact that they will hide in the smallest nooks imaginable and have a nap if they feel that they've had enough of my company. I love the fact that they are independent exercisers - I open the door and off they go. I don't have to take them for walks, or even worry if they've gone outside. They are completely independent. The Fur Snake tends to stay around the apartment, but my older cat - it never ceases to make me smile as I watch her make her way over garage roofs and hop over fence posts or crawl under a fence, depending on her destination. And finally, I am fine with kissing my cats and cuddling against them as they are so scrupulously clean (except for their little paws which are often digging in litter).

It is also myth that cats aren't affectionate or loyal. My two are very much aware of me and compete for my attention, but it's so much for subtle than with dogs. Even the younger cat, the demented Fur Snake, who comes running up to me and spends the mornings licking my fingers until I get up, has nothing on a dog. She doesn't leap up and try to lick my face. As it is, I always remind her when she is particularly aggressive in wanting my attention, "If I had wanted a *dog* I would have gotten one".

It's odd, but I wrote the above paragraphs two weeks ago when I was still struggling with getting used to the dogs. Since that time C. and I spent a ton of time with all three dogs as his family was out of the country. We took them to the beach and there I got to watch the somewhat clumsy lab excel at swimming. Also, I watched the German Sheppard jump and chase frisbees - she's so gorgeous. And finally, C's adorable dog came over to my house when I also had my parents over for dinner. She was so cute and well-behaved (apart from licking all the butter - but hey, it's an animal, I don't expect much) - AND was dying to get to know the Fur Snake (Tasha was crashed out on my bed downstairs). Of course Fur would have none of it and hissed when the dog got too close, but it was very cute.

I guess I have become a dog person. I still prefer cats, but yes, I can imagine living with a dog now. Amazing what love will do to you.