Wednesday, October 10, 2007

Out of the ether

Yesterday I received an email that made me smile all day. It was from a guy I met online about two and a half years ago. He had without a doubt one of the funniest most stand-out profiles I'd ever read. We emailed for a bit and then before we had a chance to meet, he met someone at a bar, and was decent enough to let me know that that had happened and that he was going to pursue her.

A while later, I noticed his profile online again - only somehow or other I didn't notice that it was the same guy. He had changed his picture and I was caught up in reading a different section of his profile. That's my excuse. I emailed him again. His reply pointed out [very nicely] that we had emailed before. He noted that he and the woman he had met at the bar had dated but it hadn't worked out. I was so utterly mortified that I hadn't recognized his profile from before that I almost didn't send him a reply. But I did.

I never heard back until yesterday.

Originally when I had never heard back, I just chalked it up to me being so moronic in not having recognized his profile. However, this guy explained yesterday that my email had gone into some bulk email folder on the dating site which he had not noted, and thus not checked, until a year and a half after I'd sent my reply.

I'm very impressed that he did get back to me. I will at least email him back. I'm in an open relationship so theoretically I could also set up a date with this guy. On the other hand I don't think that the Internet guy is the type to want to play the role of lover-on-the-side, and more importantly, I'm enjoying getting to know my man and don't feel like adding in anyone new at present time.


mainja said...

well, no matter what you decide to do, it's still a fun thing to have happened.

and you never know, maybe when you're ready to explore the poly side of your relationship he might be curious too... ;)

St. Dickeybird said...

"some bulk email folder on the dating site..."
As someone who's been on way too many dating sites, something screams BULLSHIT.
I've never seen a 'bulk' folder or anything like that on a dating site! Admitting that they may get uninteresting contacts would be counterproductive and very unlikely...

mainja said...

dickey - it may be that mail from the dating site telling him he has mail on the site got shuttled into his own email junk folder, and he hasn't bothered checking the site because he didn't think he had any mail.

I say this because I have done exactly the same thing, and by the time I go to the site it's been a year and I have mail that I haven't touched.

And you know me, I'm not one to not reply to mail. ;)

Perplexio said...

It's cool that he responded after all this time.

But if things are going well with the guy you currently are seeing, sometimes it's best to keep things simple.

When I was still "out there" both one of my best and one of my worst ever pre-marriage relationships sprouted from a dating site. It really can be hit or miss.

Freak Magnet said...

You've got a man?!?!?! Most excellent!!! I get so happy when I know people are getting regular sex.

Snooze said...

Mainja: Agreed on both points!

StD: I really don't think he's jerking me around. Remember how weird Nerve dating got when they switched providers? Nothing would surprise me.

Perplexio: Yes, I'm not going to pursue anything now, but I will at least acknowledge his email

FM: Yeah, regular sex is a good thing

Laverne said...


That's what I'm feeling right now.

tornwordo said...

I like dicky's domment. Also, how fun for you getting to know your man!

CoffeeDog said...

Hmm, hard call. I say stay the course on the one you're getting to know. Wouldn't hurt to go out with Internet Guy socially, once, just to see what's up. My heart likes to think that fate is real :-)

HotDudi said...

It's a compliment to have been remembered after all that time...especially if nothing actually came of your friendship/relationship. I do believe in that saying though...oh wait what is it....something about birds in your hand & not in the bushes!!!

Snooze said...

Laverne: Believe me, I paid my dues on the online dating scene

Torn: It's fun!

CD: Agreed on all counts.

Hotdudi: I like to have a hand in my bush

Anonymous said...

I think you always have to cast your net rather wide.

Is this an open relationship with a guy? I thought it was only the gay couples that did that sort of thing.

I'm horrible for replying to those dating sites messages. I've got enough to do on the computer than run off to another site every time a message comes through.

Snooze said...

Hey darlin' - I missed your comment. Sorry for the late reply. Usually it is only gay couples who are progressive enough to consider open relationships [and hey, the aren't for everyone] but there are some heteros who are willing to explore as well.